One of the lessons I took a long time to learn (but which, fortunately, you can learn from me now without having to make all the mistakes I made or take so long to learn it), is our ultimate success with our weight-loss goals stems from our mindset.

Until this vital foundation is absolutely rock solid the rest is like a house built on shifting sand (this is one of the core things we cover on the Residential Programme here at a href=””>NuBeginnings, where we share with you different tools and strategies for forming this foundation to underpin your ultimate success).

It does take a little time and effort, and it’s something we need to keep a constant watch on, lest we allow our own negative little voices distract us from our goals and aspirations.

But here’s a quick exercise you can start doing now, right away, and it’ll being you rewards massively disproportionate to the effort you have to put into it.

It’s very simple: stop comparing yourself to others.

We all do it, I know, but it’s fundamentally pointless. We’ll open up a magazine and look at the models, then read the blurb telling us if we follow this diet or that plan, we’ll look like the improbably beautiful woman in the picture; yes, we all know she’s a model, but that doesn’t stop the fanciful hope at the back of our minds that perhaps this time it’s true.

Fact is, most of us aren’t models. And no amount of exercise is going to make us one. It’s perhaps not fair and an unkindness bestowed upon us by fate, but that’s life.

And you’ll find we do this all the time: we look at other people’s success and unconsciously compare our own results to theirs. That, too, is pointless.

Apart from anything else, you can’t know what it is they are doing to get their results. Not only do people lie, but they also sincerely get it wrong.

But even if what they told you is absolutely correct, there’s every chance you could do exactly the same things they’re doing – same exercise, same time, same food, same everything – and still you’d get different results.


Because we’re all different. Our bodies are built on the same plan and we have the same broad chemical processes going on, but we’re all different in the detail, and the detail, when it comes to losing weight, makes all the difference.

There’s nothing wrong with following an established Programme like the one we have at NuBeginnings, because it’s proven to work (we’re proud of the fact that everyone who has ever come to stay with us has gone away having lost weight. We have a 100% success rate).

But it works better for some people than for others. And if you don’t get the same results as someone else, it’s too easy to conclude you’ve done something “wrong” or there’s something more serious gone awry.

Nothing could be further from the truth. The true measure of success is internal to YOU, and the best thing you can do is compare yourself to… yourself.

Trying to live up to others’ expectations is a short-cut to unhappiness and suboptimal results.